Feeing Cranky

These aren't island things, they'e just things I've noticed or that bugged me.

• There's a TV commercial that makes me cringe every time I see it. It's this old coot talking about how he's used catheters for years – yeah, that'd make you cranky, but it's not the cringe inducing part. What makes me wince is when he says this company “handles everything for me.” I do not want that picture in my head, of some faceless company “handling” his catheterization!

I mean, really, doesn't anyone at the ad agency even read the copy before they shoot the commercials?

• Got an e-mail from someone I don't know inviting me to her garden party. I suppose that was nice, but all it did was piss me off. I have no idea who this person is. People send something like this to everyone on their list and pardon me but it's thoughtless. I end up on a lot of people's e-mail lists, people I've never met, but they need to remember that we're not really "friends" just because Facebook or whatever says we are. This e-mail was written in an “Ah, it will all be so grand and I'll share my wonderful garden with all my friends” style that I'd have found annoying if I actually knew the woman. And the invite included a photo of her (but  not the garden) and I'm quite sure I don't know her. She didn't even mention what state (let alone city) she lives in. It just felt awfully presumptuous, like I should be happy to be included in the list from somebody I've never heard of for an event I have no interest in and wouldn't attend unless kidnappers took my children and made that part of the ransom demand. And the whole thing taking more than a meg in my inbox.

Man, I'm feeling cranky.

• And then there's the ad for the “only slipper you'll ever need.” It was one of those late-night commercials. I was reading and wasn't paying close attention to the TV yammering away, although I heard the claim I'd never need another pair of slippers in my life. They were enthusiastic about it on the commercial. So enthusiastic that they doubled the offer! For the incredibly low price of whatever it was, they'd send you not one but TWO pairs!

And Tori turned to me and said, “If it's the only slipper I'll ever need, why would I want two pairs?”